Izzy, You Never Left

It’s been 6 months. 6 months since the day we heard the flatline on that heart monitor. 

I stepped into her room after what felt like too many eternities waiting. She always loved giraffes. My little sister had built her whole life around them. Giraffe posters covered the walls. Giraffe print sheets, blankets, pillows, even her rug was giraffe print. Walking in there, I could hear her last words echoing in the back of my mind. I promise. I’ll come back, I won’t leave you even after I leave this world. I promise, you’ll see. When you least expect it.

Izzy had always kept her secrets, talked in twisted riddles. I stood there for a moment, laying my eyes on everything she’d ever touched. Until I heard a soft tapping by the window. I froze. There it was, standing by the windowsill. A giraffe, it looked so familiar. I slowly crept forward as the familiarity dawned on me. The eyes. Blue, big, bright, full of secrets hidden in the vast ocean of life. Just like Izzy.

The voices came back, I’m here now. Izzy? It couldn’t be, surely not, it can’t. But it could. Those eyes said it all. I reached my hand to the window, the giraffe touched its forehead to the glass in response. I heard memories, thoughts, dreams. Secrets. I could hear them, the giraffe, its thoughts ringing in my ear. I’m here. Look, I told you, even if you didn’t- or never believed it.  They were so clear yet caught in a mist. But I heard them, the words traveling past reality.

I looked into the giraffe’s longing eyes, begging for the look of realisation on my face. “ Izzy,” I said “ Oh, Izzy, I know it, it’s you isn’t it?”

The giraffe gave a faint smile. You knew, the whole time. Didn’t you?

I touched the glass. The same glass that was separating us that very moment. She felt so close then, but the universe had brought her so far.

All the memories came rushing back like an ocean tide into my head. The promises, the flatline, the time of desperation when my only light sat in that hospital bed. The day that light faded- or rather flew, flew away, into the wind, carrying the promises. I won’t leave you even after I leave this world.  I realised then, she had never come back, because she never left in the first place.

“ I have Izzy,” I began. “ I’ve always believed, I always will. You will be there the whole ride, like you said, like you promised,”

The giraffe gave one last glance and turned to leave, and yet I could still hear her in my mind clear as day. I smiled as I stared into the horizon, the giraffe was gone but she wasn’t, and neither was her voice.

Come with me, let’s just live today. I’ll see you at the finish line after I beat you to it.

I sighed and looked forward

Game on.